Utes, NZ SAS and Totty

One of the funnier aspects of New Zealand life (and this also in part goes for the big rock over the Ditch) is the popularity of the 'Ute', which I believe is an abbreviation of 'Utility Vehicle'. Here's what one typically looks like:



Usually powered by at least 6 cylinders, they are a kind of muscle car for men who perhaps think that it makes total sense to have a low-tech performance car that can carry more sheep than people. Not only sheep, but huge pieces of 'stuff', lots and lots of power tools, maybe a cement mixer or just plenty of digging equipment.
Which would be useful if you tried to take it off-road, cos you'd not be long before getting stuck due to crap ground clearance.
In their favour, they are really good value! How about just over $50k NZ for a V8 Holden SS Ute?

Just try not to think that you're driving around in a re-bodied Vauxhall Carlton, that's all...



Walking into work this morning, I also got a glimpse of the Kiwi SAS hard at work. 'What's this nonsense?' you might ask. I'm not fibbing - walking towards the office I looked up and there were several guys, dressed in regulation urban attack-wear, in a cradle hanging off the side of the building. Yes, they had sponges and buckets of water, which they were using to clean the windows, but I reckon that's just a cover...



Totty

...or non-totty? I was forced to recall a wonderful scene from that old British comedy "Men behaving badly" (I'm going to star in the remake 'Men behaving baldly'... before anyone else thinks of it) where Clunes' character Gary is told off by his girlfriend (Caroline Quentin's character) for categorising women into 'totty or non-totty'.
I had to chuckle, because as I was sat on the bus heading into work, I began to think, maybe she was onto something - as successive ladies boarded the bus, my mind was unstoppably putting labels on them, to the effect of 'totty' or 'non-totty'... Before my female readership cry out for the lynch mob, can I just point out that this wasn't a conscious effort on my part, I was effectively watching myself make these split-second decisions, based on the briefest of glances.
Anyway, I turned off monitoring this primitive biological totty-detector within minutes, I mean 'wow! look at the wheels on that Ute, man!'...