Showing posts with label NZ. Show all posts
Showing posts with label NZ. Show all posts

Thursday, December 20

South Island Touring Holiday

Having cut it short by a day, we're now back in Welly and its Friday! Should have been returning today but we got the ferry yesterday after realising that 2 nights in Blenheim would be a bit pointless - no offense, people of Blenheim, but I'm sure you understand...

I don't think I can put all my thoughts down in this one post, I'll need to think about things to get my ideas in some order, so watch out for one in a day or so detailing all that we did and saw.

Nonetheless, fabulous little adventure, seen some amazing stuff, I'd definitely recommend it to anyone even slightly impressed by scenery and nature. More to follow folks.

Thursday, November 15

Kiwi Tourist Information

These were posted on an NZ Tourism Website and the answers are the actual responses by the website officials, who obviously have a sense of humour.

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Q: Does it ever get windy in NZ? I have never seen it rain on TV, how do the plants grow? ( UK ).

A: We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around watching them die.

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Q: Will I be able to see kiwi birds in the street? ( USA )

A: Depends how much you've been drinking.

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Q: I want to walk from Auckland to Wellington - can I follow the railroad tracks? ( Sweden )

A: Sure, it's only three thousand miles, take lots of water.

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Q: Are there any ATMs (cash machines) in NZ? Can you send me a list of them in Auckland , Wellington , Christchurch and Queenstown ? ( UK )

A: What did your last slave die of?

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Q: Can you give me some information about hippo racing in NZ ? ( USA )

A: A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe .
New - Zea -l and is that island in the middle of the Pacific which does not
... oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Auckland city . Come naked.

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Q: Which direction is North in NZ ? ( USA )

A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees. Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions.

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Q: Can I bring cutlery into NZ ? ( UK )

A: Why? Just use your fingers like we do.

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Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? ( USA )

A: - New-zea- la is that quaint little country , which is ...
oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Auckland city , straight after the hippo races. Come naked.

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Q: Can I wear high heels in NZ ? ( UK )

A: You are a British politician, right?

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Q: Are there supermarkets in Auckland and is milk available all year round? ( Germany )

A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of vegan hunter/gatherers.
Milk is illegal .

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Q: Please send a list of all doctors in NZ who can Dispense spider serum. ( USA )

A: poisonous spiders live in A-meri-ca which is where YOU come from.
All NZ spiders are perfectly harmless, can be safely handled and make good pets . You should find some for yourself when you get here. Especially the ones with white tails .

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Q: I have a question about a famous animal in NZ , but I forget its name. It's a kind animal and lives in trees. ( USA )

A: It's called a Drop Bear. They are so called because they drop out of Gum trees and eat the brains of anyone walking underneath them.
You can scare them off by spraying yourself with human urine before you go out walking.

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Q: I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Can you tell me where I can sell it in NZ ? ( USA )

A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.

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Q: Can you tell me the regions in Auckland where the female population is smaller than the male population? ( Italy )

A: Yes, gay night clubs.

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Q: Do you celebrate Christmas in NZ ? ( France )

A: Only at Christmas.

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Q: I was in NZ in 1969 on R+R, and I want to contact the Girl I dated while I was staying in Wellington *. Can you help? ( USA )

A: Yes, and you will still have to pay her by the hour..

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Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? ( USA )

A: Yes, but you'll have to learn it first

Sunday, October 28

Believe

Not a lot of belief around these days, so the institutions would have us think. That's belief in the religious sense, not 'self belief' or 'political belief': no I'm thinking about the really important kind of belief that we're told is missing.

Apparently approx 50% of New Zealanders count themselves as christians, according to Gareth Newman who was speaking at Kings Church today. But of the overall Kiwi population only 1% would see themselves as falling into the evangelical or charismatic camp! I thought the number would be low, but THAT low???

Ok, so perhaps 50% of Kiwis won't be completely shut off from God come the day of reckoning, but maybe they also won't be inside the Pearly Gates either...

More to the point, I'm of the opinion that knowing the Holy Spirit before you pass away is a pretty cool thing, which is what's happening for me thank God. Its funny how most people just think religion is some dead past-time for those who can't cope or haven't the nouse to think for themselves - well that's total bollox, I'm pleased to say!

After a point on the christian road, you either accept the signs, experiences and messages that have taken place and apply to you and you alone, or you reject them and keep Jesus outside in the cold. Let each man make up his own mind - hey you've probably got a pretty good grip on things already eh?



Bet you've no idea what most of it means though, have you?

Friday, October 26

That Southern Sun

Man, I only spent a lunch-hour in the sun, but on Saturday morning I looked in the bathroom mirror and my head's gone red!

And yes I know that the ozone layer is thinner down here, there's less air pollution, which means stronger UV - even so I thought I'd be alright, but oh no, my lack of follicle shielding means the skin covering my skull is nicely pink now...

that'll teach me eh!?

As if!

Saturday, March 24

Ever heard of a Capella?

Well, you have now. We’ve just bought one, yes today, at an auction, out-right, cash!

Any women or petrol-haters, just skip this article now, it won’t interest you at all anyway. The Capella is a Mazda 626 (by another name) and we successfully bid on an Estate 4wd V6 version at Turners Saturday auction in Wellington earlier today.

Price? NZ$5900. That’s about £2100, for a 60000 mile-ish 1998 2.5 V6 4wd estate car. Ker-ching!

Most of the cars Turners auction are Jap imports, so there’s a lot of stuff you don’t even get back home, which makes it interesting. Some of its a load of old cock of course, but there’s always a few pearls if you know what you’re looking at. For example, there’s a car called a Nissan Skyline, which I didn’t even know came in saloon 4-door variant, and they had a 2001 low mileage 250GT version of this 3-series competitor, priced in the region of 5 grand! Beautiful looker, mint condition, but it got no bids so will no doubt be pawned off for even less. Criminal.

Anyway, just need to find a reputable Mazda workshop around about and get the new car checked out, then we’ll know for certain if we’ve bought a dog or not.

Friday, March 23

Uh-oh, incoming.

Reading Clarkson’s “Born to be riled” last night while suffering insomnia again has put me in the frame of mind to hurl some mindless verbal abuse about the place.

Never mind that I go to bed at a sensible time, thinking it’ll be fine and I’ll soon be snoring sweetly into Sharon’s ear just the way I know she likes. 2 (or sometimes more) hours later, I’m still lying there, wondering what I need to do to slip gently into unconsciousness!

Since we’re in a hotel, raiding the minibar for strong alcohol could easily become prohibitively expensive, so I settle for a bit of reading or a bit of web-surfing.

Anyway, I’m slipping away from ‘rant’ mode. Estate agents. I think you can imagine what I’m going to say, but I’ll tell you anyway. Why do they think they are somehow this ‘gatekeeper’ protecting their vendor from you, the thieving, manipulative, underhand buyer? “Oh, I don’t think my vendor would want to pursue that option”, “Hmm, that might be a bit low” - as if its their decision! Go back to your client (the one who I’m trying to deal with but you’re getting in the way of) and relay the message in your best spoken, using the same polite turns of phrase as I have, not undermining me with remarks about how they could probably hold on for another $10k - like we don’t know your game.

Alright, I’ll call a halt, mainly because I want to go home now, not cos I’m letting estate agents off the hook.

As if.

Saturday, March 17

Wit and wind in wet Welly

Nice bit of alliteration, eh?

Ok I might be pushing it with the wwww title, but the longer I spend here, the more I start to notice a bit of Kiwi wit seeping out - not just their humour (which I’d say overlaps with the UK sense of humour quite a bit) but also a nice level of quick-wittedness. Intial impressions of kiwis were limited to dealing with rental and real estate agents, so you can probably draw your own conclusions on how that skewed things at first!

Picked up the hounds for a group walkies yesterday, in other words we barged in on a Greyhound Rescue group walk up Paekakariki beach. Sadly, while all the dogs had a good time charging about and playing together, the heavens opened and we soon got drenched! Since ours had already had a good run about before the meet-up, we saw this as the sign that it was time to leave, specially as Jake had just jumped up at Steve’s youngest (Max) and the poor little fella was a bit shocked by so much boxer love in one go… :-)

Totally unrelated (almost) to above, Kathmandu have their Easter sale on right now, so with the wind and rain doing a suitably convincing job, Shaz picked up some Goretex trousers to make future walkies much more comfortable. Kathmandu make good all-weather gear and stuff and are well known here and in Aus - I got a Goretex jacket in Aus last year when my luggage got knicked and rate them highly.

Wednesday, March 14

House

Hmmm… not so simple is it. Mind you, house buying rarely is, is it?!

We’ve hit a potential snag with the mortgage borrowing - turns out that lenders aren’t that keen on lending over 80% of ppty value to folks without permanent residency… which we don’t have.

Would have been nice of the mortgage adviser to point this out when we went to see her BEFORE we offered on the house! Anyway, she mailed us this morning AFTER we’d signed the deal and mentioned this feature. Needless to say got straight on the ‘old blower’ to her and asked what could be done!

And from talking to her again this afternoon, turns out there SHOULD be at least one lender who will loan up to 90% (that’s fine, that’ll do), as we just need to be able to demonstrate lender approval by Friday to ensure the deal goes ahead.

In the meantime, seems that in fact the lenders she spoke to were unhappy about me not having a contract specifying permanent employment, as my current contract (for whatever reason!) actually specifies a 2-year placement. Another email to work has now followed, to request that my contract be updated to PERMANENT, which will hopefully mean other lenders will subsequently give us quotes for the house we want to buy.

ARRGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

House buying - bag o’ sh*te…

Friday, March 9

Saturday morning

There’s apparently powerboat racing around Wellington this weekend! Cool!

Not sure we’ll get chance to watch any of it however, as going to see a potential rental this morning, then picking up the ‘kids’ for the afternoon and got a fair few viewings tomorrow. Obviously finding somewhere to live is a teensy bit more important than power boats, but only just! :-)

Went out for a ‘recommended’ chinese last night. When I say recommended in quotation marks, you’ll perhaps detect a hint of sarcasm. You’d be right, it was appalling: cheap ingredients prepared badly, too much MSG, and service to make a battery hen feel cared for. FYI, it was Uncle Chang’s over on Courtenay Place and the recommendation came from our Rough Guide to New Zealand book - I shall be considering their culinary commendations with great care in future!

Got up kinda early on Wed morning this last week to try and catch the sunrise over Wellington, plus it’d give me chance to try out the new Nikon D40 I’ve ’somehow’ acquired :-)

Here’s the shots if you wanna look: link

Thursday, March 8

House Hunting…Pain in the ****

Forgotten how tiresome estate agents are, never mind letting agents! Still, feels a bit like we made some headway today, going to see them in person rather than relying on what they get around to posting on t’internet…

Seen all the main agents in Johnsonville (which also serves Newlands, the key area we’re interested in), even though if possible it’d probably make more sense to just rent somewhere - so far we’ve only got one rental lined up to go and see on Monday which will potentially allow dogs! Talk about being forced into buying!!!

Not that I mind buying somewhere as long as its realistically priced and mortgages are available to suit budget: and there lies the problem - the financial services industry here is way behind the UK, and apparently interest-only mortgages are only available to those on low income (!) and also attract an even higher rate! Not that borrowing money here is cheap anyway, the base interest rate just jumped up 1/4 point to 7.5! Meaning lenders are offering 8.5 and above on average, and then you have to take out a capital and interest mortgage!!!

Hmmm…

Not defeated yet though, we’re going to meet up with a broker on Monday and should be able to figure out how to work a way around the noddy financial market here.

Seen a couple of reasonable places anyway, got some more to see over next few days but its tough going and need to get over a few hurdles before we can start to enjoy things much.

Monday, March 5

6 Days In (and counting)

Since arriving last Wednesday, been on a bit of a rollercoaster, emotionally anyway. Yes its summer in NZ and work aren’t being too pushy about keeping me busy just yet a while, but we’re in a strange country with no friends and no home.

Hence the rollercoaster… feels great one moment and crap the next. Looking like we might be forced into buying a place, as landlords apparently universally not keen on tenants with dogs, never mind that we’ve arrived in Welly at just the same time as all the frickin’ students start their courses (thus taking all the cheap rental accommodation already!).

As buying is quite a serious move, it means looking pretty carefully at what’s involved, how much we can borrow, what it’ll cost etc etc, oh, and will the house we worth at least as much in a couple of years (if) when we come to sell it!?

On a lighter note, went up over the Rimutaka Hills on Sunday to have a look at Featherston, plus took the dogs for walkies on Paekakariki beach today, so here’s some snaps: clicky

By the way, if you’ve taken the time to read this drivel, feel free to say “hallo” so we at least know people are actually surfing the blog and I’m not just pee-ing into the wind…

Thursday, March 1

Hallo Welly!

Wednesday morning saw us getting up early again!

Good job we did, as it happens - the Courtyard Marriott we were staying in had conveniently put the checkout bill under our door during the night and there was the small matter of the AU$100 per night surcharge they had added, despite being informed on our arrival on Sunday that no such fee would be necessary!

Sorting that out was painful and NOT what we expected at 6am in the morning - that coupled with the leaky room problem has really put me off even considering ever going back to a Courtyard hotel!

However, its all behind us now… we’ve been in Welly 2 days now! When we came in on Wed afternoon the sky was clear blue and the sun shining very brightly (when its shining, it tends to be very bright!). So deffo a good introduction to the place. And it wasn’t too breezy either…

…although we’ve since experienced a bit of the famous ‘windy Wellington’ since then! :-)

Went out with work guys last night in town for beer and curry, so Shaz got to meet Susy, her partner Jacko, Damian the local boy, Terry from back home, Linas, Daniel, Ann and James from Brisbane. Its now about 7 on Friday morning, managed to stay unconscious until half 6, which isn’t too bad, though you can bet we’ll be feeling exhausted again come early evening…

Off out today looking at areas again, along with picking up the ‘babies’ from Welly airport after their long transglobal flight. Will take them for walkies before dropping them off at the kennels in Glenside which we visited yesterday.